I cheated. It started off so innocent. A little look here or there, or a little stare as I went by. Then one day, I paid to experience how it would be. Oh, yes, I not only cheated, but I dabbled in prostitution. Before I knew it, it consumed my every thought. I even started looking up things online.
I would say I am sorry, but we all really benefited from it. I mean, seriously...we all did. Well, everyone except for my Subaru. I just couldn't help but be tempted. Stow and go seats, better miles per gallon, the Johnny Rottens are farther in the back which means we get to talk without interruptions - which by the way, as much as I love The Weasel doing so well in school, it really s-u-c-k-s that I can't spell things out to J anymore.
Wait a minute! You know I was talking about our new van, right?!? I mean seriously, who could ever cheat on a man like J? Especially because I dislike cheaters - unless you are cheating on your car, then I'll help - I mean...encourage...ah crap. Seriously, people the man wears Carhartt. Need I say more?
Let me clarify that I do feel guilt. Mostly when J parked my Subuie behind the van and made it stare at the new mistress all night. But, oh sweet, baby...*sigh* I'll never go back to a car again..unless J gets me a sweet little BMW Z4 when I get my masters. We'll talk then. ;)
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